If you had my number and phoned me I probably wouldn’t answer. For numerous reasons. Terrible reception is one. You know, the sort of terrible reception you’d expect from being right at the centre of one of the biggest cities on earth. Despising being on the phone is another, better reason. I hate phones. Paulie from Goodfellas had it right. About the phones, I mean. Not the kneecap shattering.

Having said that, you can WhatsApp me if you’re interested in instant(ish) messaging. Just click the button below and I’ll reply as and when…

Message on WhatsApp

If you’re one of those who’re offering to develop me a new website for £5, ‘SEO services’, water coolers for my ‘office’ or discounted wristwatches and sex pills please do fill in the from below. I’ve always got time to reply back to you people. Always.