Angelina Jolie

Vector drawing. My old man’s a hooker, he wears a hooker’s hat.

So you know that recent(ish) trend, whereby people put a general synopsis of what they are at the top of their CV? I bet this one runs thusly: Two giant lips on a stick. You know that Rolling Stones logo thing? That. Rendered flesh. On a stick.

Somewhere along the lines it probably divulges the giant game of real-life ‘Risk’ she’s playing with Madonna. First one to collect a child from each continent wins the game. I think Jolie’s edging it.

With that in mind, how did she manage to adopt in the first place?! Her first husband was a heroin addict called ‘Sick Boy’, her second married her with her blood in a necklace round his neck and her current effort punches the faces off people in at least two films I can think of.

I mean, I’m no social worker or anything, but I’d be all over that.

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